搏斗集 2023 Struggle on the Cliff’s Edge 2023 第 02 篇 Section 02
一月 癸卯年祝祭：灯塔下的海岸 January: Invocation for the Year of Guimao: The Coast Beneath the Lighthouse
返回 搏斗集 2023 Back to Struggle on the Cliff’s Edge 2023新年的数字流沙在生命的指尖流逝，好像没有什么心思掰着手指数公历年的翻篇，农历新年似乎还有些指望？各大平台上的明星对兔年的宣传可谓铺天盖地。而我似乎还有些无措：我对兔年的印象还停留在喜羊羊大电影兔年顶呱呱，时间就这样在我的生命里刻下一轮。
The hourglass grains of the New Year slip through the fingertips of existence; I have little heart to count down the turning pages of the Gregorian calendar, yet perhaps the Lunar New Year still holds a glimmer of promise? Celebrity promotions celebrating the Year of the Rabbit flood every platform. Yet I feel somewhat disoriented: my memory of the Year of the Rabbit remains frozen in the childhood animated movie Pleasant Goat and Big Big Wolf: Moon Castle: The Space Adventure. Just like that, time carves another completed orbit into my life.
回顾即将过去的这一年，我深刻体会到珍惜眼前的一切。“世上好物不坚牢，彩云易散琉璃脆。”2022年第一件大事高考，我曾因此捶胸顿足懊丧不已，一方面当然是有环境的客观原因，另一方面在主观上我囿于“一考定终身”的虚无中奔波劳碌。总之，结果还是不算太坏，努力了就没什么好遗憾的。至于第二件大事恋爱，收获尽在不言中。就当是我大学第一学期的选修课吧。2023，敬请期待。
Reviewing the year that is drawing to a close, I deeply comprehended the urgency of cherishing what lies before my eyes. “Fine things in this world are never durable; colorful clouds easily scatter, and colored glaze is brittle.” The first monumental milestone of 2022 was the Gaokao: I once beat my breast in bitter remorse over it, partly due to external circumstances, but subjectively because I was exhausted running in circles within the nihilism of “one exam dictates a lifetime.” In short, the outcome was not terribly bad; having poured in my full effort, there are no lingering regrets. As for the second milestone—falling in love—the dividends need no elaboration. Consider it an elective course taken in my first semester of university. 2023, stay tuned.
站在2023年的节点上，我此刻一方面心念着物与神的二元关系，担心物质充足而精神匮乏，因迷茫而消沉，另一方面苦恼于“换赛道”的纷扰。我选择珍惜我脆弱而精致的小世界，准备好面对未知的黑雨。黑雨虽烈，逢尘化雪！
Standing at the crossroads of 2023, my mind ponders the dualism of matter and spirit—fearing material abundance coupled with spiritual famine, sliding into lethargy from disorientation, while wrestling with the turbulence of “switching tracks.” I choose to cherish my fragile, exquisite little universe, preparing to face the uncharted black rain. Though the black rain beats fiercely, upon meeting dust it turns to snow!
日出未必意味着光明，太阳也无非是颗晨星而已，只有在我们醒着时，才是真正的破晓。返校大巴路上，眺望到了国际博览中心。今番重经此处，没有那天的和风暖阳、唯有孤身一人，甚至连相遇时的核酸检测点也没有了。光风霁月，清朗明静。收拾行囊，挥鞭扬帆。
Sunrise does not necessarily signify light; the sun is but a morning star. Only when we are awake is there dawn. Riding the bus back to campus, I gazed toward the International Expo Center. Passing this spot once more, the gentle breeze and warm sunshine of that day were gone; there was only solitary solitude, and even the nucleic-acid testing site from our first meeting had vanished. Clear winds and a bright moon, tranquil and pristine. Pack the luggage; raise the whip and unfurl the sails.
现在看来，在浮躁的生活下，聆听安静的音乐，简单生活，真好。短暂的绚烂，长久的枯败。这个世界，在目前这个状态下，是无法让人容忍的。因此，我需要月亮，或者幸福，或者永生，需要的东西也许是荒唐的，是这个世界上没有的。
Looking back now, amid restless existence, listening to quiet melodies and living simply is truly wonderful. A fleeting blaze, an enduring decay. This world, in its present condition, is intolerable. Therefore, I need the moon, or happiness, or immortality—things that are perhaps absurd, things that do not exist in this world.
那么，爱能拯救世界吗？我愿意在20岁前尝试去热爱去感受。
Can love, then, save the world? Before turning twenty, I am willing to endeavor to love and to feel.
i burn，i never die，i love.
늘 혼자 견디지 말고
Just take my hand.