苇草集 2022 Reeds in the Wind 2022 第 08 篇 Section 08
八月 向人生更深处驶去 August: Sailing into the Deeper Waters of Life
返回 苇草集 2022 Back to Reeds in the Wind 2022抖音里不论成绩高低，上至清北下至苏科大，都在发上岸视频。其实何为上岸？踏上坚实的大地。在我看来，中学时代的结束不过是一场向更深处驶去的开端。不过也许只是自己无时无刻身处象牙塔，对一些平凡里的小确幸已经感到讶异了。
On Douyin, regardless of scores—from Tsinghua and Peking University down to Suzhou University of Science and Technology—everyone is posting videos celebrating “landing ashore.” Yet what does it mean to land ashore? To set foot upon solid earth. In my eyes, the conclusion of middle and high school years is nothing more than the prologue to sailing into deeper waters. Perhaps, however, it is merely that having spent every waking moment ensconced in an ivory tower, I have grown unaccustomed to the quiet, everyday blessings of ordinary life.
最近因为加微信，和几个久违的小学同学交流，尴尬的发现：对于他们来说，我好像说什么都像是在装逼，甚至连我的大学都被顶礼膜拜…
Recently, after connecting on WeChat and catching up with several elementary school classmates after a long hiatus, I made an awkward discovery: to them, anything I said seemed like showing off, and even the university I was attending was revered as if on a pedestal…
在别人眼里，我小学时是优秀的升旗手，初中时是成绩优异的全班第一，高中时是人人瞩目的重点班巨佬，大学又即将成为一本院校的大学生。
In the eyes of others, in elementary school I was an outstanding flag-bearer; in junior high, an academically stellar student ranking first in class; in high school, a spotlighted giant in an elite key class; and now in university, about to become an undergraduate at a university admitting students in the first admission batch.
但在我看来，每一步都胆战心惊，况且每一阶段总有一片更广阔的可望不可及的天空，属于更优秀的人。所谓的“优秀”对于我真正而言，不过是认识了更优秀的同学，收获了更丰厚的见识。
Yet in my own view, every single step was taken with trembling trepidation. Moreover, at every stage there was always a broader, unreachable expanse of sky belonging to those who were far more exceptional. What “excellence” truly meant to me was nothing more than getting to know more brilliant classmates and harvesting a richer breadth of insight.
但见不到这片天空的人想必还有很多，他们就生而屑屑么？非也。实际上，作为一个中度精神内耗患者，我相较于羡慕那些可望不可及的学神，更羡慕着那些凝视自己的内心，追寻自我的幸福的人。
Yet there must be countless others who never glimpse that sky—are they born trivial and unworthy? Far from it. In truth, as a moderate sufferer of spiritual internal friction, rather than envying those unattainable academic gods, I envy far more those who gaze into their own hearts and pursue their own happiness.
这三个月里，将心态从当初的彻底绝望调整到现在充满斗志。也该出发了！正如她说：“可以短暂停留，但一定不能忘记出发。”相信写下这些的她也对我的未来怀着期待吧。
Over these three months, I have recalibrated my mentality from the initial utter despair to being full of fighting spirit today. It is time to set sail! Just as she said: “One may pause briefly, but must never forget to depart.” I trust that she who wrote these words harbors anticipation for my future as well.
愿未来的我不负于现在的选择。本科四年一定要努力！中国大陆top20高校，四年之后我不会再失约了。
May my future self live up to the choices of today. I must strive with all my might throughout the four undergraduate years! A top-20 university in mainland China—four years from now, I will not miss that appointment again.